Growing Pains

feel it twist
deep down in the depths of me
feel its fist
close over the bones of me
I know I said I’d stop it
And love this part of me
but it’s like learning a new language
it’s like trying to speak

— but no words come out
what’s the word for that now?
how can I put words on a feeling
On a memory in time?
You can’t explain with words
what your body knows inside
But I’ll try
Oh I’ll try
For the sake of a younger me who just wants to see me smile

oh I know just how she’s feeling
because her feelings are all mine
but sometimes I feel she’s left me
for the younger years gone by.

let’s be honest
all the stories I write are about someone else
but the story of my future is one I can only write myself
but the pages are left unwritten
If I can barely pick up the pen
when will my hands stop hitting and try create something instead?

Kate Moran